Wednesday, January 25, 2012

Pearls and Cowboy Boots

I'm on Pinterest. I use it to catalog the clothes I'd like to buy, places and images into which I like to escape, and great ideas and tips about everything from home organization to crafts for kids.

I've noticed a trend lately that disturbs me: photos of very young children wearing age-inappropriate clothing, with comments from people who think it's adorable. "I have to do this with my kid!" they say. "What a fantastic photo - I wish I'd thought of it!" "So cute!"

These photos aren't pornography. But there is something about them that makes me really, really uncomfortable.

Let's start with this one. This is actually from an etsy site - a woman makes these lace rompers for little girls. Her site has tons of photos like this one - a very young girl wearing the romper equivalent of a lace mini-dress, with pearls and cowboy boots. This baby girl is dressed like a hooker.


This one is from the website of a professional photographer. Some of her children's portraiture examples are indeed adorable. The ones of kids between the ages of 6 and 8 are especially good - she seems to really capture who they are. And then there's this one, which had me asking, "What the hell were you thinking?"

There are others.

It's taken me a while to wrap my head around why these types of photos upset me. I still haven't wrapped my head around it entirely, but I can articulate a few reasons.

1. There is nothing wrong with taking photos of your toddler that show his or her innocence. If those photos involve them not wearing clothes, I don't have a problem with that. But don't post them on public internet sites where people who see something other than their innocence can find them. I've taken photos of Moe in the bath because he's adorable in the bath. But those photos aren't visible to just anyone.

2. Childhood is so fleeting. It goes by so fast. Kids only have that total innocence for a few years - maybe 8 at most. Why on earth would you want to hurry that process? Why wouldn't you want your toddler in overalls and play clothes for as long as possible? After all, there are so many forces out there that want to hurry the process along for you - why would you contribute to that?

I don't know. Am I being unrealistic here?

8 comments:

  1. I have pictures of Maggie in the bath, I have a picture of her just her face that she looks beautiful in, but it's also a picture that I can see being used in ways that make me very uncomfortable, so I keep those to myself.

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  2. When you photograph a child being childlike and doing their own thing it's a wonderful tribute to that child's beauty and uniqueness. When the child says "Mommy I want to put on your dress and wear your pearls." and you take a photo of the child doing that, it is an honest image of that child's innocence and cuteness...however taking that photo does steal a tiny piece of that child's image/identity and give it to the hands of the photographer. If it's done out of love and in an honest way it does not seem to exploit very much. However, when you pose a child in mommy's dress and pearls and it's no longer the child's idea, that child is now a prop. The more the adult manipulates and constructs the image, the less of the real child's nature is actually there. Yet there they are. And since that little piece of them is now in a hard copy in someone else's hands, it is no longer the child's (never really was) to control. The more images of a child that are out there that exploit that innocence the more others will have the freedom to do what they want (nefarious or otherwise) with those images. Images of children should above all else not expose them in ways that they themselves would agree to if they had the mental capacity to do so.

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    1. *woud NOT agree to I meant to say! :)

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    2. Thanks for this - it makes a lot of sense, for sure. The kids are props, and they are being manipulated.

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  3. You are absolutely not alone in this feeling. I wouldn't let my daughter dress like that at ANY age. As an adult, I would also wonder why I was dessed like that as a toddler. It just makes me uncomfortable and does not feel like it is in good taste. What is so appealing to adults about dressing their child like an adult? Had my child gone in and put cowboy boots on and nothing else, I may find it cute and take a picture to remember the moment by. But I wouldn't publish it for the world to see. I have a friend on my FB who takes pictures as a side business. She takes all sorts of photos of her beautiful girls in tube tops and jewellery and it makes me cringe!

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    1. Exactly. The photos aren't of kids being kids, and even if they were, they shouldn't be posted for public viewing.

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  4. she looks darling! relax! if her mama and daddy agreed to it, then ok.

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